Those that know me know that when I immerse myself in something it often consumes me. Some people have the ability to juggle multiple interests, remain engaged in each of them, and balance them with work and family life. This is a struggle for me. When asked, I will tell people that my hobbies include scuba diving, triathlon, photography, home improvement, and motorcycles. What’s not as clear is what I’m interested in right now, because rarely (never) do multiple interests get mindshare simultaneously. This has always been both a blessing and a curse for me, because while immersing myself into something has always yielded big gains in that area quickly, it’s always to the detriment of everything else. Case in point- I have an unfinished wine cellar, a dusty guitar, and a tech diving training sign-off that are both ‘in limbo’ at the moment- all are victims of the interest du jour, and are waiting their turn on the hobby merry-go-round. I’ll get back to them eventually. I always do.
The current fixation is triathlon, again. The past 8 weeks have been some of the best training I’ve ever done, and I’m ecstatic with the gains I’ve made. I’ve dropped 8 pounds since Thanksgiving. I’ve gone from zero running two months ago to running 8 miles at an 8:20 pace. I’ve raised my threshold power on the bike by 15 watts. The frustrating part is that I’ve been at this level of fitness many times before, so while its fun and gratifying to see the improvements, it’s also a downer to have to work so hard just to get back to where I’ve been. Unlike other interests, triathlon training is definitely a “use it or lose it” proposition. My hard-earned new scuba diving skills will be there again after a few dives when I get back to diving seriously. The progress I’ve made on the wine cellar sits there, tantalizingly (and for Francine, infuriatingly) near completion. Stepping away from some things results in very little backslide. Stepping away from triathlon for any significant length of time sends you more or less back to square one.
So my challenge to myself, my New Year’s resolution of sorts (although I don’t believe in New Years resolutions) isn’t to race again in 2009, but to make triathlon a foundational aspect of my life again. For several years it was. Since that time I’ve made several attempts to get back into triathlon, but I’ve not succeeded in becoming a triathlete again. Despite all the great gains I’ve made in the past several weeks, and for all the mental and physical energy I’ve put into training, I’m not there yet. Triathlon is still the fixation of the moment. The telltale signs are all there… passing on lunch with friends to train instead, feeling guilty about not getting two workouts in that day, gauging how good the past week was by how long the long ride was. All of these things are clues that balance is completely lacking. So maybe it’s time to measure success a different way. Success will be when I miss that long ride and don’t sulk about it for the next two days, or when I accept that lunch invitation even though I didn’t swim that morning. Then I’ll know that I’m on my way to making triathlon a sustainable part of my life again. Only then will I be able to call myself a triathlete, and only then will I be able to entertain thoughts of racing another Ironman- something that I’ve always said I would do again practically since I crossed the finish line of my first one, but something requires several seasons of continuous dedication and training to do. And, most importantly, only then will I be able to make time for other interests to coexist with triathlon in my life. The irony of the situation is not lost on me- in order to realize any sort of lasting gains and reach a level of performance beyond what I’ve achieved in the past I need to be a little less consumed with triathlon. The real achievement will be in not being passionate about it, but instead being dedicated.
Now, if you’ll excuse me I have a lunch appointment with a friend to go to.
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